Fire Truck

"Diet Tips"*

*A woman was terribly overweight, so her Doctor put
her on a diet. Doctor says, "I want you to eat regularly
for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks.

The next time I see you, I bet you will have lost at least 5 pounds."

When the woman returned, she shocked the doctor
by losing nearly 20 pounds.

"Why, that's amazing!" the doctor said, "Did you follow
my instructions?"
       
The woman nodded yes, "I'll tell you though, I thought
I was going to drop dead that third day."

The Doctor looking somewhat puzzled says:

"From hunger you mean?"

"No, from skipping."

*************************************************************

"Fire Truck"*

*A fire started on some grassland near a farm. The county
fire department was called to put out the fire. The fire
was more than the county fire department could handle.
Someone suggested that a nearby volunteer bunch be
called. Despite some doubt that the volunteer outfit
would be of any assistance, the call was made.

The volunteers arrived in a dilapidated old fire truck. They
rumbled straight towards the fire, drove right into the
middle of the flames and stopped! The firemen jumped
off the truck and frantically started spraying water in all
directions. Soon they had snuffed out the center of the
fire, breaking the blaze into two easily controlled parts.

Watching all this, the farmer was so impressed with the
volunteer fire department's work and was so grateful
that his farm had been spared, that right there on the
spot he presented the volunteers with a check for $1,000.

A local news reporter asked the volunteer fire captain
what the department planned to do with the funds.

"That ought to be obvious," he responded, wiping
ashes off his coat. "The first thing we're gonna do is
get the brakes fixed on our fire truck!"
Received on Mon Jul 19 01:52:07 2010