Facts of Life

"Facts of Life"*

*A father was explaining the facts of life to his
teenage son. After covering the basic biology,
he moved on to the finer points of love-making:

Father: One thing to keep in mind, son, is that
different women say different things during the
sex act, even if you are doing the same thing.

Son: What do you mean, Dad?

F: Well, for example, their words will vary according
to their occupation. For example, a prostitute will
tend to say, "Are you done yet?" On the other
hand, a nymphomaniac will ask, "Are you done already?"

S: What do other women say?

F: Well, a school teacher will say, "We are going to
do this over and over again until you get it right!"
A nurse will say, "This won't hurt one bit."

S: I thought they said, "Pull down your pants and bend over."

F: That's male nurses. But let's move on, a bank
teller will say, "Substantial penalty for early
withdrawal." A stewardess will say, "Place this
over your mouth and nose and breathe normally."

S: And what does mother say?

F: She says, "Beige... beige... I think we should
paint the ceiling beige."
Received on Mon Nov 2 06:56:43 2009