Directions

"Directions"*

*A tourist is walking on a country road, when a farmer
comes along with his horse-drawn cart. "Excuse me,
is this the road to Suwalki?" the tourist asks.

"Yes, it is," says the farmer.

"How far is it?"

"Half an hour by cart."

"May I ride with you?"

"Certainly."

After half an hour, the tourist begins to grow uneasy.
"How much further is it to Suwalki by cart?" he queries.

"Oh, an hour or so."

"What? You told me it was only half an hour away, and
we have been traveling that long already!"

"Yes, but in the opposite direction."

*************************************************

"Death Bed"*

*Farmer Brown is lying on his deathbed barely able to
breathe. Just as he is about to expire, the aroma of
freshly baked brownies comes to him. He has always had
a passion for this confection and thinks to himself,
'If I could just have one more brownie I could die in
peace!' He calls to his wife but his voice is so frail
she cannot hear him. Not getting an answer, he slides
out of the bed and onto the floor. He drags himself
across the room and out into the hallway.

Down the hall and down the stairs he goes ever so
slowly, crawling hand over hand closer to that heavenly
smell. At the bottom of the stairs he pulls himself
along painfully -- hand over hand closer to that delicious aroma.

He drags himself across the living room across the
dining room and finally up into his chair at the dining table.
He reaches across the table and grabs the tray of freshly baked brownies.

As he drags the tray towards himself it makes a
scraping noise, and suddenly he hears his wife yell from the kitchen,
"Don't touch the brownies, they're for the funeral!"
Received on Fri Feb 27 08:05:05 2009