Rejection Letter

"Rejection Letter"

TROJAN CONDOM COMPANY INC.
6969 SLIPPERY ROOT DRIVE
DROPTROUSER, NC 22269

Dear Mr. Jones;

We regret to inform you that we have rejected your
application to model and represent our product, Trojan Cond*ms.

Although your general physical appearance is not
displeasing, our Board of Directors feels that your
wearing of our product in the advertisement does
not portray a positive, romantic image of our product.
A loose, baggy and wrinkled cond*m is not considered romantic.

We did admire your efforts to firm up by using poly-grip,
but even then it slipped off before we could get the
photographs taken. We would like to note, however,
that yours is the first we've seen that looked like a bicycle grip.

We appreciate your interest and thank you for your time.
We will retain your application for future consideration,
if by chance we decide there is a market for micro-mini cond*ms.

We send greetings to your wife and/or girlfriend and our deepest sympathy.

YOURS VERY TRULY,

Burly Dick: President
TROJAN CONDOM COMPANY INC.

P. S. Remember our slogans:
- cover your stump before you hump
- don't be silly, protect your Willie
- never deck her with an unwrapped pecker
- before you attack her, wrap your wacker
- if you're not going to sack it, go home and whack it.
Received on Fri Jun 22 07:41:18 2007