What People Say And Mean

"The Gift Of Communication"

There was a man who traveled all around the
world. Every city he stopped in he would buy
something for his mother and send it to her.

On one such stop he found a parrot that spoke
thirty different languages. He immediately
bought it and sent it home to his mother.

A few days later he calls his mother. "Did you
like the parrot?" he asked her.

"Oh yes," she replied. "It was delicious."

"WHAT!" the man cried. "You ate it! That parrot
wasn't for you to eat! It spoke thirty languages!"

The mother paused for a moment and then said,
"So why didn't he say something?"

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"What People Say And Mean"

When a diplomat says "No", he means "Maybe".
When a diplomat says "Maybe", he means "No".
When a diplomat says "Yes", he's not a diplomat.

When a wife says "No", she means "Maybe".
When a wife says "Maybe", she means "Yes".
When a wife says "Yes", she's not your wife.

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"The Beautiful Bird"

One day a man went to an auction. While there,
he bid on a parrot. He really wanted this bird,
so he got caught up in the bidding. He kept on
bidding, but kept getting outbid, so he bid higher
and higher and higher.

Finally, after he bid way more than he intended,
he won the bid - the parrot was his at last!

As he was paying for the parrot, he said to the
Auctioneer, "I sure hope this parrot can talk. I
would hate to have paid this much for it, only to
find out that he can't talk!"

"Don't worry." said the Auctioneer, "He can talk.
Who do you think kept bidding against you?"
Received on Sun Oct 2 01:54:17 2005