Hang-gliding

"Hang-gliding"

Here in Kentucky, you don't see too many people
hang-gliding. Bubba decided to save up and get a
hang-glider. He takes it to the highest mountain,
and after struggling to the top, he gets ready to take
flight. He takes off running and reaches the edge--
into the wind he goes!

Meanwhile, Maw and Paw Hicks were sittin' on the
porch swing talkin bout the good ol days when maw
spots the biggest bird she ever seen!

"Look at the size of that bird, Paw!" she exclaims.

Paw raises up," Git my gun, Maw."

She runs into the house, brings out his pump shotgun.
He takes careful aim. BANG...BANG.....BANG.....BANG!
The monster size bird continues to sail silently over
the tree tops.

"I think ya missed him, Paw," she says.

"Yeah," he replies, "but at least he let go of Bubba!"

***********************************************

"Jesus and The Redneck"

An Irishman in a wheelchair entered a restaurant
one afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of
coffee. The Irishman looked across the restaurant
and asked, "Is that Jesus sitting over there?" The
waitress nodded "yes," so the Irishman told her to
give Jesus a cup of coffee on him.

The next patron to come in was an Englishman
with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth,
painfully sat down, and asked the waitress for a cup
of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant
and asked, "Is that Jesus over there?" The waitress
nodded, so the Englishman said to give Jesus a
cup of hot tea, "my treat."

The third patron to come into the restaurant was a
Redneck on crutches. .... He hobbled over to a booth,
sat down and hollered, "Hey there, sweet thang. How's
about gettin' me a cold glass of Coke!" He,too, looked
across the restaurant and asked, "Is that G~d's boy
over there?" The waitress once more allowed as how
it certainly was, so the Redneck said to give Jesus a
cold glass of Coke, "on my bill."

As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Irishman,
touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are
healed." The Irishman felt the strength come back into
his legs, got up, and danced a jig out the door.

Jesus also passed by the Englishman, touched him
and said, "For your kindness, you are healed."
The Englishman felt his back straightening up, and
he raised his hands, praised the Lord and did a series
of back flips out the door.

Then Jesus walked towards the Redneck. The
Redneck jumped up and yelled,
"Don't touch me... ... I'm drawin' disability!"
Received on Fri Jul 15 02:04:12 2005