Cruise Control

"Cruise Control"

My family has a tradition of naming the cruise control
on our cars. We were used to hearing my father proclaim,
"Take it, Max," as he flipped on the cruise control during
long trips in our station wagon.

Recently, I was travelling with my parents in their new car
when we hit a wide-open expanse of highway. My dad
leaned back and said, "I think I'll let Tom drive for a while."

"Tom who?" I asked.

My mother translated for me: "Tom Cruise, of course."

*****************************************

"Tail Light"

"How long have you been driving without a tail light?"
asked the policeman after pulling over a motorist.
The driver jumped out, ran to the rear of his car and
gave a long, painful groan.

He seemed so upset that the cop was moved to
ease up on him a bit.

"Come on, now," he said, "you don't have to take it
so hard. It isn't that serious."

"It isn't?" cried the motorist.

"Then you know what happened to my boat and trailer?"
Received on Wed Aug 10 09:44:03 2005