Some New Viruses

"Some New Viruses"

The George Bush Virus - Causes your computer to
keep looking for viruses of mass destruction.

The John Kerry Virus - Stores data on both sides of
the disk and causes little purple hearts to appear on
your screen.

The Ronald Reagan Virus - Saves your data, but forgets
where it is stored.

The Bill Clinton Virus - Gives you a permanent Hard
Drive with no memory.

The Al Gore Virus - Causes your computer to just keep
counting and re-counting.

The Bob Dole (aka Viagra) Virus - Makes a new hard
drive out of an old floppy.

The Lewinsky Virus - Sucks all the memory out of your
computer, and then e-mails everyone about what it did.

The Arnold Schwarzenegger Virus - Terminates some files,
leaves, but will be back.

The Mike Tyson Virus - Quits after two bytes.

The Oprah Winfrey Virus - Your 200 GB hard drive shrinks
to 100 GB, and then slowly expands to re-stabilize around
350 GB.

The Ellen Degeneres Virus - Disks can no longer be inserted
into the floppy drive.

The Prozac Virus - Totally screws up your RAM, but your
processor does not care.

The Michael Jackson Virus - Only attacks minor files.

The Lorena Bobbitt Virus - Reformats your hard drive into a
3.5-inch floppy and then discards it through Windows.
Received on Mon Nov 8 23:01:45 2004