Hurricane Tips I & II

"Hurricane Tips I"

We're about to enter the second part of the hurricane season.
Any day now, you're going to turn on the TV and see a weather
person pointing to some radar blob out in the Atlantic Ocean
and making 2 basic meteorological points:
(1) There is no need to panic.
(2) We could all be killed.

Yes, hurricane season is an exciting time to be in Florida. If
you're new to the area, you're probably wondering what you
need to do to prepare for the possibility that we'll get hit by
"the big one." Based on our experiences with Frances and
Jeanne, we recommend that you follow this simple three-step
hurricane preparedness plan:
STEP 1: Buy enough food and bottled water to last your family
for at least three days.
STEP 2: Put these supplies into your car.
STEP 3: Drive to Nebraska and remain there until Halloween.

Unfortunately, statistics show that most people will not follow
this sensible plan. Most people will foolishly stay here in
Florida. We'll start with one of the most important hurricane
preparedness items:

"Hurricane Tips II"

HOMEOWNERS' INSURANCE: If you own a home, you must
have hurricane insurance. Fortunately, this insurance is
cheap and easy to get, as long as your home meets two basic
requirements:.....
(1) It is reasonably well-built, and.....
(2) It is located in Nebraska......

Unfortunately, if your home is located in Florida, or any other
area that might actually be hit by a hurricane, most insurance
companies would prefer not to sell you hurricane insurance,
because then they might be required to pay YOU money, and
that is certainly not why they got into the insurance business
in the first place. So you'll have to scrounge around for an
insurance company, which will charge you an annual premium
roughly equal to the replacement value of your house. At any
moment, this company can drop you like used dental floss.

Since Hurricane Frances, I have had an estimated 27 different
home-insurance companies contact me. This week, I'm
covered by the Bob and Big Stan Insurance Company, under
a policy which states that, in addition to my premium, Bob
and Big Stan are entitled, on demand, to my kidneys.
Received on Sun Nov 7 22:14:54 2004