Subject: You Know You're In Trouble When...
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Mon Apr 14 2003 - 02:32:24 EDT
"You Know You're In Trouble When..."
Your accountants letter of resignation is
postmarked Zurich.
You have to hitch hike to the bank to make
your car payment.
The little league puts you on waivers.
Your suggestion box starts ticking.
Your secretary tells you the FBI is on line 1, the
DA is on line 2, and CBS is on line 3.
You see your stockbroker hitchhiking out of town.
You see the captain running toward the railing
wearing a life jacket.
They pay your wages out of petty cash.
The moths in your money belt starve to death.
You make more than you ever made, owe more
than you ever owed, and have less than you've
ever had.
You tell the barber what you think about his prices
before you get your haircut.
Getting there is half the fun and three-fourths of
the vacation budget.
The simple instructions enclosed aren't.
People send your wife sympathy cards on your
anniversary.
Your wife starts charging you rent.
A black cat crosses you path and drops dead.
You take an assertiveness training course and
you're afraid to tell your wife.
You see your wife and your girlfriend having lunch
together.
The plumber floats by on your kitchen table.
Your pacemaker has only a thirty day guarantee.
There are two elephants, two giraffes, and two
zebras in your yard and your next door neighbor
is building an arc.
The candles on your cake set off your smoke alarm.
The pest exterminator crawls under your house
and never comes out.
This archive was generated by hypermail 2b28 : Thu May 01 2003 - 00:00:02 EDT