Subject: If Women Ruled the World...
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Thu Jul 05 2001 - 09:52:47 EDT
"If Women Ruled the World..."
- Men would sit around and wonder what WE are
thinking.
- Women with cold hands would give men prostate
exams.
- PMS would be a legitimate defense in court.
- Men would get reputations for sleeping around.
- Singles bars would have metal detectors to weed
out men hiding wedding rings in their pockets.
- A man would no longer be considered a "good catch"
simply because he is breathing.
- Fewer women would be dieting because their ideal
weight standard would increase by 40 pounds.
- Shopping would be considered an aerobic activity.
- "Ms." Magazine would have an annual swimsuit
issue featuring scantily clad male models.
- Men would not be allowed to eat gas-producing
foods within two hours of bedtime.
- Men would be secretaries for female bosses,
working twice as hard for none of the credit.
- Little girls would read "Snow White and the
Seven Hunks."
- Men would bring drinks, chips and dip to women
watching soap operas.
- Men would HAVE to get Playboy for the articles,
because there would be no pictures.
- Men would learn phrases like: "I'm sorry," "
I love you," "You're beautiful," "Of course you
don't look fat in that outfit."
- Men would be judged entirely by their looks, women
by their accomplishments.
- Men would pay as much attention to their woman as
to their car.
- All toilet seats would be nailed down.
- Men would work on relationships as much as they
work on their careers.
- TV news segments on sports would never run longer
than 1 minute.
- All men would be forced to spend one month in a
PMS simulator.
- During mid-life crisis, men would get hot-flashes and
women would date 19-year-olds.
- Overweight men would have their weight brought to
their attention constantly.
- After a baby is born, men would take a six-week paternity
leave to wait on their wives hand and foot.
- For basic training, soldiers would have to take
care of a two-year old for six weeks.
This archive was generated by hypermail 2b28 : Wed Aug 01 2001 - 00:00:01 EDT