Subject: Idiot Olympic Questions
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Thu Sep 21 2000 - 23:06:35 EDT
"Idiot Olympic Questions"
Here are some of the classic questions that
were asked of the Sydney Olympic Committee
via their Web site, and answers supplied where
appropriate.
Q: Can I drive to the Great Barrier Reef?
(Germany)
A: Sure, if your vehicle is amphibious.
Q: Are there killer bees in Australia? (Germany)
A: Not yet, but we'll see what we can do when
you get here.
Q: Can you give me some information about
hippo racing in Australia? (USA)
A: What's this guy smoking, and where do I
get some?
Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney, and is
milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: Another blonde?
Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia
who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: I love this one...there are no rattlesnakes in
Australia.
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir
schedule? (USA)
A: Americans have long had considerable trouble
distinguishing between Austria and Australia.
Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA)
A: Face North and you should be about right.
Q: I have a question about a famous animal in
Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear
and lives in trees. (USA)
Q: I have developed a new product that is the
fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can
sell it in Australia? (USA)
A: From Liz Taylor, perhaps?
Q: Are there places in Australia where you can
make love outdoors? (Italy)
A: Yes. Outdoors.
Q: Will I be able to speek English most places
I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first.
Q: Are there any ATMs in Australia? Can you
send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns,
Townsville and Hervey Bay? (UK)
A: No, and we use shells for money.
Q: Can I drive to the Great Barrier Reef?
(Germany)
A: Sure, if your vehicle is amphibious.
Q: Are there killer bees in Australia? (Germany)
A: Not yet, but we'll see what we can do when
you get here.
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