Subject: Basketball Coaches
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Fri Sep 22 2000 - 23:56:45 EDT
"Top Ten Rejected Summer Olympic Events"
10. The Marge Schott-put
9. Hide the javelin
8. Tackle the French guy
7. Speed blinking
6. Trouser hockey
5. Synchronized shrugging
4. 100-meter dash with a fat guy on your back
3. Female weightlifter mustache tweezing
2. Pantsless pole vault
1. Lookin' terrific
************************************
"Basketball Coaches"
Three coaches flew to the NCAA convention.
The plane crashed; and all 3 died.
All 3 noticed Lord up in the clouds sitting in
a chair. Lord motioned for one of them to come
into the clouds. Lord wanted to know three things:
Who are you?
What did you do?
What did people think of you?
The 1st person said, "I'm Denny Crum, I was
2nd best coach in the nation. I won 2 national
championships & over 20 games a year. The
people of Kentucky think I'm great."
Lord said, "Fine, Denny, stand on my right side.
The next person said, "I'm Rick Pitino. I was
the 3rd best coach in the nation. I won an SEC
Championship and turned the program around
to a fairly respectable one. The people of
Kentucky think I'm great."
Lord said, "Fine, Rick, stand on my left side."
The 3rd person stood before Lord and said,
"I'm Bobby Knight & I have won 3 national
championships, 2 NIT championships, the
Pan Am Games, the Olympics, 9 Big Ten
championships, and I was the youngest coach
ever to win 600 games, and the people of
Indiana think you are sitting in my chair."
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