Subject: Kangaroo Thrills
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Fri Jan 14 2000 - 06:20:47 EST
"The Escaped Ape"
One day an ape escaped from the Bronx Zoo.
They searched for him everywhere, in every
borough. They announced his disappearance
on the radio and television as well as the
newspapers. But, no one reported seeing the ape.
At last, he was discovered in the New York Public
Library. Officials of the zoo as well as the animal
handlers were summoned to the library. They
found the ape sitting at a desk in the reading room
with two books spread out in front of him. The ape
was reading with great concentration. One book
was the Bible; the other written by Darwin.
The zoo keepers asked the ape what he was
doing. The ape replied, "I'm trying to figure out
whether I am my brother's keeper or whether
I am my keeper's brother."
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"Kangaroo Thrills"
One afternoon, a woman was visiting a zoo.
When the afternoon was about to end, she
found herself near the kangaroos. Friendly
as they were, she started to pet them.
Suddenly an uncontrollable urge came over
her to reach down and squeeze the poor
animal's balls. She had squeezed too hard,
as the kangaroo started to wildly jump around.
Higher and higher, the kangaroo jumped
around until it cleared the high fence and
escaped.
Scared, the woman looked around to see if
anybody noticed her actions. She saw the
zookeeper running toward her, so she
started to run.
As the zookeeper caught up, he pleaded
while pulling down his pants ...
"Sorry, ma'am, you're going to have to
squeeze mine, too! I'm the poor guy who
has to catch that thing ..."
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