Subject: Chivalry
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Mon Feb 14 2000 - 04:32:37 EST
"Carrying Photos"
Hubby, "You always carry my photo in your
handbag to the office. Why?"
Wife, "When there is a problem, no matter
how impossible, I look at your picture, and
the problem disappears."
Hubby, "You see, how miraculous and powerful
I am for you?"
Wife, "Yes, I see your picture and say to myself,
'What other problem can there be greater than
this one?"
***************************************************
"Buying A Gun"
A woman goes into a sporting goods store to buy
a shotgun. "It's for my husband," she tells the clerk.
"Did he tell you what gauge to get?" asked the clerk.
"Are you kidding?" she says. "He doesn't even know
I'm going to shoot him!"
***************************************************
"Chivalry"
The divorce proceedings had been long,
contentious, and extremely heated.
Finally, the husband's attorney rose for one
last try at a no-alimony settlement.
"Your Honor," he said, "my client sincerely
believes his wife is just being ridiculous.
Why, most women would love to have a
husband who still believes in chivalry; and
on the day in question, he was only opening
the door for her out of chivalry."
"Counselor," replied the judge, "I am granting
the divorce and the settlement Mrs. Smith
is asking in its entirely. I simply cannot
believe chivalry was the motivation for your
client opening that car door - while he was
driving down the freeway at 65 mph."
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