Subject: Holiday Travel
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Thu Dec 21 2000 - 06:53:10 EST
"Holiday Travel"
United Airlines and asked for a reservation
from Los Angeles to New York. The clerk
knew that the plane was very full with
baggage and passengers.
"How much do you weigh, Sir?" asked the
clerk.
"With or without clothes?" the passenger
asked.
"Well," said the clerk, "how do you intend
to travel?"
**********************************
"Mistletoe at the Airport"
It was slightly before Thanksgiving. The trip
went reasonably well, and he was ready to go
back. The airport on the other end had turned
a tacky red and green, and loudspeakers
blared annoying elevator renditions of cherished
Christmas carols.
Being someone who took Christmas very
seriously, and being slightly tired, he was not
in a particularly good mood.
Going to check in his luggage (which, for some
reason, had become one suitcase with entirely
new clothes), he saw hanging mistletoe. Not
real mistletoe, but very cheap plastic with red
paint on some of the rounder parts and green
paint on some of the flatter and pointier parts,
that could be taken for mistletoe only in a very
Picasso sort of way.
With a considerable degree of irritation and
nowhere else to vent it, he said to the attendant,
"Even if I were not married, I would not want
to kiss you under such a ghastly mockery
of mistletoe."
"Sir, look more closely at where the mistletoe is."
(pause)
"Ok, I see that it's above the luggage scale,
which is the place you'd have to step forward
for a kiss."
"That's not why it's there."
(pause)
"Ok, I give up. Why is it there?"
"It's there so you can kiss your luggage goodbye."
This archive was generated by hypermail 2b28 : Mon Jan 01 2001 - 00:00:01 EST