Subject: Signs Santa Doesn't Like Your Kid
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Wed Dec 20 2000 - 04:12:16 EST
"Top Ten Signs Santa Doesn't Like Your Kid"
10. Kid's letter to north pole comes back
stamped, "Dream on, Chester!"
9. Kid asks for new bike, gets pack of smokes.
8. Along with presents, Santa leaves hefty
bill for shipping and handling.
7. By the time he gets to your house, all he
has left are styrofoam peanuts.
6. Christmas day, your kid wakes up with
a Reindeer head in his bed.
5. Instead of "Naughty" or "Nice", Santa has
him on the dork list.
4. Sends him off on one of them Carnival
Cruises with Kathie Lee.
3. First words when kid gets on his lap are,
"Touch my beard, and I'll put the hurt on you."
2. Labels on all your kid's toys read "Straight
from Craptown."
1. Four words: "Off my lap, Tubby!"
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