Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Wed, 22 Sep 1999 06:08:30 -0400
"Cat Tidbits"
Q. Why does a tiger have stripes?
A. So he won't be spotted.
Q. What do you call a cat who does tricks?
A. A magic kit.
Q. What kind of work does a weak cat do?
A. Light mouse work.
Q. Why did the mother cat put stamps on
her kittens?
A. Because she wanted to mail a litter.
Q. Which state has a lot of dogs and cats?
A. Petsylvania.
Q. Which game did the cat want to play
with the mouse?
A. Catch.
Q. What do English cats drink in the
afternoon?
A. Kit-tea.
Q. Where did the kittens go on their
class trip?
A. To a mewseum.
Q. How do you call a barber cat?
A. Yell..."Hair Kitty!"
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"Falling Out"
Studies show that if a cat falls off the seventh
floor of a building it has about thirty percent
less chance of surviving than a cat that falls
off the twentieth floor. It supposedly takes
about eight floors for the cat to realize what
is occurring, relax and correct itself. Let me
get this straight. A cat is falling from the
twentieth floor and it RELAXES?? It would
take me eight floors just to remember to
yell, "Oh $*#@)$*@t!"
***********************************************************
"Cat Movies List"
Below is a list of movies whose titles
relate in some way to cats, along with
how they relate.
Kitties at play in the night: "The Charge
of the Light Brigade"
Get off the counter! Don't eat the plants! :
"The Ten Commandments"
Kitty outside: "Bye-Bye Birdie", "Predator"
Let me in *NOW*: "Singing in the Rain",
"The Howling"
You can't stop me from getting out!:
"The Great Escape"
Lap cat's movie: "Sleeper"
Hero, my cat, is fat: "Hero at Large"
Obsessed cat at play: "She's Gotta
Have It"
My dish is empty--again!: "The Hunger"
Cat's eyes at night: "The Shining"
Exploring Fluffy's mind: "2001: A Space
Odyssey"
Cat behaves angelically, always: "The
Cat from Outer Space"
Kitty jumping onto wood heater or
stove: "Mrs Doubtfire", "Cat on a Hot
Tin Roof"
Kitty in the bath: "Splash"
Kitty walking amongst crockery:
"Shattered"
Kitty licking her lips while sitting in
bassinet: "Whatever happened to Baby
Jane"
Kitty climbing up tree or swinging on
curtains: "Tarzan of the Jungle"
Kitty chasing food around floor: "Meatballs"
Kitty going crazy chasing moths /
anything / nothing: "Psycho"
Kitty sneaking into my car to sleep:
"A Streetcar named Desire"
Anytime, anywhere--the Disney flick
"That Darn Cat!"
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.0b3 on Wed Sep 22 1999 - 09:00:02 EDT