Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Sun, 03 Oct 1999 03:15:20 -0400
"Speech Impediment"
Over drinks one afternoon a buddy of mine
and I were discussing former "loves." I told
him that I once broke-up with a girl long ago
because she had a seemingly incurable
speech impediment.
George said, "Jimmy, I'm shocked. I never
know you to be one to be prejudiced against
handicaps. What was the girl's problem?"
Taking a sip, I paused and reflected. "She
couldn't say 'Yes.'"
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"Definitions"
Definition of a gentleman:
Takes all his weight on his elbows.
Definition of a lady:
Let's a gentleman be one.
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"Fun At The Fair"
This guy took his blind date to an amusement
park. They went for a ride on the Ferris wheel,
and she seemed bored. "What would you
like to do next," he asked.
"I wanna be weighed," she said.
So the guy takes her to the weight guesser.
"One twelve," said the man at the scale,
and he was absolutely right.
Next they rode the roller coaster. After
that, he bought some popcorn and cotton
candy, then he asked what else she
would like to do.
"I wanna be weighed," she said, again.
"I really latched onto a winner tonight,"
thought the young man, and using the
excuse that he had developed a
headache, he took the girl home.
The girl's mother was surprised to see
her home so early, and asked, "What's
wrong, dear, didn't you have a nice
time? How was your date?"
"Oh," said the girl, "It was wousy."
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