Unicorn (Unicorn@Indenial.com)
Mon, 26 Apr 1999 09:37:08 -0400
"New Rating System"
{To all of the redheads out there!}
Two cowboys were leanin up against the rail at their favorite
bar... They're tired and worn out from a long day. Havin' a
couple of longnecks, just relaxin' and talkin', watchin' the
women go by... This really beautiful brunette walks by, and
the two cowboys look at her, tip their hats back a little, look
at each other, smile, and one of them says, "I'll give her a 3."
Other cowboy nods slowly, and says,
"Yep. She's a 3 for sure."
Little while later another woman, this time a fantastic looking
blonde, comes walking by in front of them... First cowboy
looks her up and down, smiles, takes a sip from his beer,
and says to the second cowboy, "Well, I think that one must
be a 4." And the second cowboy agrees, and says,
"Yep... she sure is a 4."
Time passes on by, and the cowboys are still sippin' their
beers, just watchin' folks pass. And across the room comes
this absolutely gorgeous, drop-dead beautiful redhead... As
she comes near them, they both kinda straighten up, and tip
their hats back a little for a better look. First cowboy smiles
real wide, looks at his pal and says, "Damnnn. That one
has GOT to be a 6." And the second cowboy nods slowly,
grins, and says, "Yep. DEFINITELY a 6."
Well, the redhead hears them... and she is NOT amused.
She turns around real sharply and comes right up to the
two grinning cowboys...
She looks the first one in the eye and says, "Excuse me.
But, are you two actually standing there rating women??!?"
The cowboys look kinda embarrassed... lookin' down at
their boots, and they both nod. One of them says, "Well,
yes ma'am, we are, but you don't understand..."
She is REAL mad now... and looks at the cowboy and
says, "Well, I'll have you know I've been rated far higher
than that, by far better than YOU."
And the second cowboy says, "But, ma'am, you really
don't understand!"
And she says, "Well. What is it I don't understand?
Here you are, rating women. I understand THAT."
And the first cowboy says, "But ma'am, we use a
different kinda rating system......."
The redhead says, "Oh. And what would THAT be?
No one has EVER rated me a SIX before..."
And the second cowboy says, "Well, we use the
Budweiser method, ma'am."
So she asks..."What in the hell is the Budweiser method?"
And the first cowboy smiles, looks at her and says,
reallllll slowly, "Well ma'am, that's how many Clydesdales
it would take to pull you off of my face."
***********************************************************
"Several Hundred Orgasms"
During a course in human sexuality, the instructor
was discussing various items in the Kinsey report.
The class members gasped audibly when the
instructor read out that a woman had several
hundred orgasms in a single session.
A male voice said, "Wow, who was she?"
A female voice followed with, "The hell with that ...
Who was 'HE?' "
This archive was generated by hypermail 2.0b3 on Tue Apr 27 1999 - 09:00:02 EDT