A Cup of Coffee and a Fly

"NASCAR Driver Jeff Gordon Fires Entire Pit Crew"*

*This announcement followed Gordon’s decision to
take advantage of President Obama’s proposal to
employ Harlem youngsters.

The decision to hire them was brought about by a
recent documentary on how unemployed youths
from Harlem were able to remove a set of wheels
in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment,
whereas Gordon's existing crew could only do it in
8 seconds with millions of dollars worth of high tech
equipment. It was thought to be an excellent and
bold move by Gordon’s management team as most
races are won or lost in the pits.

At the crew’s first practice session, not only was the
inexperienced crew able to change all 4 wheels in
under 6 seconds, but within 12 seconds they had
also changed the paint scheme, altered the VIN
number, and sold the car to Dale Jr. for 10 cases
of Bud, a bag of weed, and some photos of Jeff
Gordon’s wife in the shower.

*******************************************************

"A Cup of Coffee and a Fly"*

*What happens when a fly falls into a cup of coffee?

The Italian throws the cup, breaks it, and walks
away in a fit of rage.

The German carefully washes the cup, sterilizes it
and makes a new cup of coffee.

The Frenchman takes out the fly, and drinks the coffee.

The Chinese eats the fly and throws away the coffee.

The Russian drinks the coffee with the fly, since it was
extra with no charge.

The Israeli sells the coffee to the Frenchman, the fly to
the Chinese, makes a cup of tea for himself and uses
the extra money to invent a device that prevents flies
from falling into cups.

The Palestinian blames the Israeli for the fly falling in his
coffee, protests the act of aggression to the UN, takes
a loan from the European Union to buy a new cup of
coffee, uses the money to purchase explosives and
then blows up the coffee house where the Italian, the
Frenchman, the Chinese, the German and the Russian
are all trying to explain to the Israeli that he should
give away his cup of tea to the Palestinian.

Rush Limbaugh blames the Democrats for allowing
the fly to get into the coffee to begin with.
Received on Sun Sep 19 14:49:04 2010