Sleeping Pill

"Sleeping Pill"*

*Tom had this problem of getting up late in the morning
and was always late for work. His boss was mad at
him and threatened to fire him if he didn't do something about it.

So Tom went to his doctor who gave him a pill and told
him to take it before he went to bed. Tom slept well
and in fact beat, the alarm in the morning. He had
a leisurely breakfast and drove cheerfully to work.

"Boss", he said,

"The pill actually worked!"

"That's all fine" said the boss, "But where were you yesterday?"

*******************************************************

"Funeral Procession"*

*A woman was leaving a 7-11 with her morning coffee
when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession
approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse
was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind.

Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking
a pit bull on a leash. Behind her were 200 women walking
single file. The woman couldn't stand her curiosity. She
respectfully approached the woman walking the dog and
said, "I am so sorry for your loss and I know now is a bad
time to disturb you, but I've never seen a funeral like this.
Whose funeral is it?"

The woman replied, "Well, the first hearse is for my husband."

"What happened to him?"

The woman replied, "My dog attacked and killed him."

She inquired further, "Well, who is in the second hearse?"

The woman answered, "My mother-in-law. She was trying
to help my husband when the dog turned on her."

A poignant and thoughtful moment of silence passes
between the two women. "Could I borrow that dog?"

"Get in line."
Received on Mon May 17 21:40:25 2010