Catholic Shampoo

"Catholic Shampoo"*

*While shopping in a food store, two nuns happened
to pass by the beer, wine, and liquor section. One
asked the other if she would like a beer.

The second nun answered that, indeed, it would be
very nice to have one, but that she would feel
uncomfortable about purchasing it.

The first nun replied that she would handle that
without a problem. She picked up a six-pack and
took it to the cashier. The cashier had a surprised
look, so the nun said, "This is for washing our hair."

Without blinking an eye, the cashier reached under
the counter and put a package of pretzel sticks in
the bag with the beer.

"The curlers are on me!"

********************************************************

"Ready To Find Jesus"*

*A drunk stumbles along a baptismal service on
Sunday afternoon down by the river.

He proceeds to walk down into the water and stand
next to the preacher. The minister turns and notices
the old drunk and says, "Mister, are you ready to find Jesus?"

The drunk looks back and says, "Yes, Preacher, I sure am."

The minister then dunks the fellow under the water
and pulls him right back up.

"Have you found Jesus?" the preacher asked.

"No, I didn't!" said the drunk.

The preacher then dunks him under for quite a bit
longer, brings him up and says, "Now, brother, have you found Jesus?"

"No, I have not, Reverend."

The preacher in disgust holds the man under for at
least 30 seconds this time, brings him out of the water
and says in a harsh tone, "My G~d, man, have you found Jesus yet?"

The old drunk wipes his eyes and says to the preacher,
"Are you sure this is where he fell in?"
Received on Mon Jul 19 01:31:34 2010