New Definitions

"New Definitions"*

*ADULT:
A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the
middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR:
A place where women curl up and dye.

BLAMESTORMING:
Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a
project failed and who was responsible.

CANNIBAL:
Someone who is fed up with people.

CHICKENS:
The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE:
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST:
Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST:
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

GOSSIP:
A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage.

HANDKERCHIEF:
Cold Storage.

INFLATION:
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

INTAXICATION
Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was
your money to start with.

MYTH:
A female moth.

MOSQUITO:
An insect that makes you like flies better.

RAISIN:
Grape with a sunburn.

SARCASM:
The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the recipient who just
doesn't get it.

SECRET:
Something you tell to one person at a time.

SKELETON:
A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.

TOOTHACHE:
The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOMORROW:
One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

YAWN:
An honest opinion openly expressed.

WRINKLES:
Something other people have. You have character lines.
Received on Mon Jan 4 06:58:32 2010