Rudolph's Wish

"Rudolph's Wish"*

*Christmas was over. Santa and his reindeer finally
had a chance to rest. And they deserved it. They
 had done a good job.

Rudolph had a chance to do something he had
wanted to do for a long time. He made an
appointment with a plastic surgeon because he
was so sensitive about his looks.

However, it wasn't his glowing proboscis that he
wanted changed. He was proud of his nose and
the help he had given Santa because of it. No, he
was sensitive about his long ears which were much
more prominent than the ears of the average
reindeer, or bear, for that matter.

So one week after Christmas, he let the good doctor
do the reconstructive surgical procedure, and since
that time, January 1st has been celebrated as ...

New Ears Day.

***************************************************

"The Giant"*

*One day a planet was discovered out Antares way
whose sole inhabitant was an enormous humanoid,
three miles high. At first it was mistaken for an
immense statue left by some vanished race of giants,
for it sat motionless on a yellow plain, exhibiting no
outward sign of life. It had legs, but it never rose to
walk on them. It had a mouth, but never ate or spoke.
It had what appeared to be a perfectly functional brain,
the size of a condominium, but the organ lay dormant,
electrochemical activity at a standstill. Yet it lived.

This puzzled the scientists, who tried everything they
can think of to get some sign of life from the behemoth --
in vain. It just sat, motionless and seemingly thoughtless,
until one day a xenobiologist, frustrated beyond endurance,
screamed, "How could evolution give legs, mouth, and brain
to a creature that doesn't use them?"

It happened that he was the first one to ask a direct
question in the thing's presence. It rose with a thunderous
rumble to its full height, scattering the clouds, thought for a
second, boomed "IT COULDN'T", and squatted down again.

"My G~d," exclaimed the xenobiologist, "of course! It only stands to
reason!"
Received on Mon Jan 4 06:56:19 2010