A More Accurate Computer Term Dictionary

"A More Accurate Computer Term Dictionary"*

*State-of-the-art:
Any computer you can't afford.

Obsolete:
Any computer you own.

Microsecond:
The time it takes for your state-of-the-art computer to become obsolete.

G4:
Apple's new Macs that make you say, "Gee, it's four times faster than
the computer I bought for the same price a microsecond ago."

Syntax Error:
Walking into a computer store and saying, "Hi, I want to buy a computer
and money is no object."

Hard Drive:
The sales technique employed by computer salesmen, especially after a
Syntax Error.

GUI (pronounced "gooey"):
What your computer becomes after spilling your coke on it.

Keyboard:
The standard way to generate computer errors.

Mouse:
An advanced input device to make computer errors easier to generate.

Floppy:
The state of your wallet after purchasing a computer.

Laptop Computer:
A device invented to force businessmen to work at home, on vacation, and
on business trips.

Disk Crash:
A typical computer response to any critical deadline.

System Update:
A quick method of trashing ALL of your software.
Received on Thu Nov 12 11:29:16 2009