Not So Steel Magnolia

"Not So Steel Magnolia"*

*Last October, after much deliberation, I bought a
magnolia tree from our local nursery. After only a
few weeks I noticed that the leaves had started
to shrivel and the tree appeared to be on its last
legs in spite of my tender care.

So I took some leaf samples and marched back to
the nursery to demand an explanation or get my money back.

"I know exactly what's wrong with your magnolia," said the manager.

"Good!" I exclaimed. "What's it suffering from?"

You can imagine how stupid I felt when he said, "Autumn."

********************************************************

"Yummy Mushrooms"*

*While hiking in the country, my friend Eve and I spotted
a huge bed of mushrooms that we knew to be edible.
We gathered a large basketful and sauteed them that
night. My husband Phil refused to eat them, thinking
they might be poisonous.

Two weeks later, Eve and I gathered some more
mushrooms. This time, Phil joined us.

"How is it that you're eating these mushrooms tonight,
"I asked, "when you wouldn't touch the ones we brought
home two weeks ago? What changed your mind?"

"I thought about it," Phil explained seriously, "and I
figured it would be better to be found dead with you
two than to try to explain two dead women in my home."
Received on Thu Jan 15 08:18:35 2009