Ways To Annoy The Person Sitting Next To You In A Public Library 26 - 55

"Ways To Annoy The Person Sitting Next To You In A Public Library"*

*26. Act like you’re picking your nose. And eating it.

27. Snort loudly, and gargle with your spit.

28. Sneeze a lot.

29. Hold your book right next to your eyes.

30. Every few minutes, get up out of your chair, walk
around the table, and sit back down.

31. Stand up, and continue reading.

32. Make a strange sound every few minutes, then act like you didn't do it.

33. Bring a bag of cat food, and start snacking on it.

34. Bring a box of crunchy cereal, a bowl, and a spoon.
Then dig in messily, and crunch on it.

35. Ask them, Got milk?

36. Read out loud attempting to pronounce easy words.
Butcher them badly. But be able to pronounce hard words.

37. Fall out of your seat, then say, I meant to do that. Then do it
again. And again.

38. Bring a laptop, and turn up the sound, and play a very noisy game.

39. Wear too many sweaters, and complain how hot it is.

40. Bring one of those fans with a squirt bottle
attached, and make it look like you’re attempting to
squirt yourself, but hit them instead.

41. Bring a bottle of squirtable mouth freshener, and
miss every time you try to spray it into your mouth.

42. Wear A LOT of putrid smelling cologne or perfume.

43. Spill that same cologne or perfume on their book.

44. Put down your book, then say, Hey, ya wanna trade?

45. Bring a recording of very obnoxious music, and hide
it in a bag. Turn it up full blast, and accuse them of
having it. Keep accusing them, then get the librarian
to come. When they find it in your bag, yell, IT WAS
PLANTED ON ME I TELL YOU!!!!! IT’S NOT MY FAULT!! IT’S
A GOVERNMENT CONSPIRACY!! ALIENS BEAMED IT INTO MY BAG!!!
IT’S BECAUSE I DIDN'T LET THEM DO EXPERIMENTS ON ME!!

46. Without looking away from your book, say to no one
in particular, 'I know what you did last summer.'

47. Bring a piece of bread, and drop pieces of it down
the little hole in the center of the table meant for cords.

48. While reading your book, start humming a single
note until you’re out of breath, then collapse on the floor.
Then get back up, and continue reading like nothing happened.

49. Start singing This is the song that never ends.

50. While placing small pieces of bread in a line,
count one, two, three. . ., and lose count every ten or so.

51. Bring a recording of a popular song. Play it on
headphones quietly, but sing along very badly. Then say
to the person next to you, 'I took singing lessons!'

52. Turn to the person sitting next to you and say to
them, 'Hey! How ya doin’? That’s great, me too.'

53. Instead of a laptop, bring your entire computer!

54. While working at a laptop, suddenly stand up, and
announce to every one, I have mail!!

55. Start staring at the person, and when you have
their attention, announce, I measure sock by thickness!
Received on Sat Apr 4 07:08:45 2009