How 'Real Men' Bathe Cats

"Eating with Dogs"

There's a guy with a Doberman Pinscher and a guy
with a Chihuahua. The guy with the Doberman
Pinscher says to the guy with a Chihuahua,

"Let's go over to that restaurant and get something
to eat."

The guy with the Chihuahua says, "We can't go in
there. We've got dogs with us."

The guy with the Doberman Pinscher says, "Just follow
my lead." They walk over to the restaurant, the guy with
the Doberman Pinscher puts on a pair of dark glasses,
and he starts to walk in.

A guy at the door says, "Sorry, mac, no pets allowed."

The guy with the Doberman Pinscher says, "You don't
understand. This is my seeing-eye dog."

The guy at the door says, "A Doberman Pinscher?"

He says, "Yes, they're using them now, they're very
good."

The guy at the door says, "Come on in."

The guy with the Chihuahua figures, "What the heck,"
so he puts on a pair of dark glasses and starts to walk
in. The guy at the door says, "Sorry, pal, no pets allowed."

The guy with the Chihuahua says, "You don't understand.
This is my seeing-eye dog."

The guy at the door says, "A Chihuahua?"

The guy with the Chihuahua says, "What? You mean
they gave me a Chihuahua?"

***********************************************

"How 'Real Men' Bathe Cats"

1. Scrub toilet and flush several times.

2. Fill toilet with warm water and add a squirt of
pet shampoo.

3. Drop the cat in toilet and slam lid shut.

4. Sit on lid, cat's efforts to free itself will generate
a good deal of sudsing and washing motions.
Have something handy to read while waiting.

5. Flush toilet a couple of times to rinse cat.

6. Leap off toilet seat, dash out the door and slam
it securely shut behind you, kitty will erupt from the
bowl as if jet engine were behind it.

7. Leave kitty to sulk and dry itself.

{Joke du Jour does not recommend the above
procedure under the penalty of being clawed
to death the next time kitty gets a hold of you....
usually when you're peacefully asleep...}
Received on Thu May 3 10:11:08 2007