Clemency

"Talks Too Much"

Eight-year-old Nina brought her report card home
from school. Her marks were good...mostly As and
a couple of Bs.

However, her teacher had written across the bottom:
"Nina is a smart little girl, but she has one fault. She
talks too much in school. I have an idea I am going
to try, which I think may break her of the habit."

Nina's dad signed her report card, putting a note on
the back: "Please let me know if your idea works on
Nina because I would like to try it out on her mother."

**********************************************

"Clemency"

Mrs. Johnson went to the Mayor's office to plead
clemency for her husband, Fred, who was serving
time in jail. The Mayor received her graciously.

"Now, Mrs. Johnson, how long will Fred be in jail?"
asked the Mayor.

Mrs. Johnson replied, "Thirty days."

"And what's the charge?"

"No charge," Mrs. Johnson answered, "Everything's
free!"

The Mayor said, "No,no,no, I mean, why did he get
sent to jail?"

"Oh, he stole a loaf of bread."

"Well, is he a decent father to Fred Jr.?"

"He's the worst. He drinks, he gambles my paycheck
away, and he uses his fists."

"He uses his fists a lot?"

"Yes. Fred was fourteen before he realized he had
fingers!"

The Mayor was confused. "Why do you want him
back?"

Mrs. Johnson replied, "Well...We're out of bread
again!"
Received on Tue May 1 06:21:17 2007