Really Short Takes

"Really Short Takes"

A wise man once asked me, "What is the sound
of one hand clapping?"
I thought for a minute, then I slapped him across
the face. That got him off my back.

Two hydrogen atoms are leaving a bar.
"Dang!" says one; "Hold on a minute, I left
my electron in there."
"Are you sure?" asks his friend.
"I'm positive."

The Boston Herald reported that Massachusetts
has come up with a new slogan: "Massachusetts...
Make it yours."
Which, I think, is a lot better than New York's slogan:
"New York . . .Up yours."

A Scientist from Argentina, after a lengthy study,
has discovered that people with insufficient brain
activity read their e-mail with their hand on the
mouse.
(Don't bother taking it off now, it's too late :)

Last week my boss said he was going to garnish
my wages. Call me dense, but I fail to see how
a sprig of parsley in my paycheck will make it any
more attractive.

Rookies (or, players in their first year) are named
after the rook in chess.
Rooks generally are the last pieces to be moved
into action, and the same goes for Rookies.

Younger generations have come to read e.g. as:
"example given", although e.g. is actually abbreviation
for the Latin phrase "exempli gratia" which means
"for the sake of example."
This is a great example that shows how language
is altered with and by the younger generations.

Scientists have just announced the successful
birth of the world's first porcu-cow. It's
half-porcupine, and half-cow. Conveniently,
this steak comes with toothpicks.
Received on Tue Feb 6 06:59:07 2007