Cold Is A Relative Word

"Cold Is A Relative Word"
Degrees (Fahrenheit):

65 Hawaiians declare a two-blanket night

60 Californians put on sweaters (if they can
find one)

50 Miami residents turn on the heat

45 Vermont residents go to outdoor concerts

40 You can see your breath; Californians shiver
uncontrollably and Minnesotans go swimming

35 Italian cars don't start

32 Water freezes

30 You plan your vacation to Australia

25 Ohio water freezes; Californians weep
pitiably; Minnesotans eat ice cream and
Canadians go swimming

20 Politicians begin to talk about the homeless;
New York City water freezes and Miami residents
plan vacation further South

15 French cars don't start and Cat insists on
sleeping in your bed with you, under blanket.

10 You need jumper cables to get the car
going.

-5 American cars don't start and Alaskans
put on T-shirts

-10 German cars don't start and Eyes freeze
shut when you blink

-15 You can cut your breath and use it to build
an igloo; Arkansans stick tongue on metal
objects and Miami residents cease to exist

-20 Cat insists on sleeping in pajamas with
you; Politicians actually do something about
the homeless; Minnesotans shovel snow off
roof and Japanese cars don't start

-25 Too cold to think and You need jumper
cables to get the driver going

-30 You plan a two week hot bath and Swedish
cars don't start

-40 Californians disappear; Minnesotans
button top button; Canadians put on sweaters
and your cat helps you plan your trip South

-50 Congressional hot air freezes and
Alaskans close the bathroom window

-80 Hell freezes over; Polar bears move
South and Green Bay Packer fans order
hot cocoa at the game.

-90 Lawyers put their hands in their own
pockets.
Received on Tue Nov 28 05:42:35 2006