Book Report

"Book Report"

Students were assigned to read 2 books, "Titanic"
and "My Life" by Bill Clinton and turn in book reports
on each of them. One sharp witted student turned in
the following book report, with the proposition that
they were nearly identical stories and hence only
one book report was required! His cool professor
gave him an A+ for this report:

Titanic: $29.99
Clinton: $29.99

Titanic: Over 3 hours to read
Clinton: Over 3 hours to read

Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden
love, and subsequent catastrophe.
Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden
love and subsequent catastrophe.

Titanic: Jack is a starving artist.
Clinton: Bill is a bullsh*t artist.

Titanic: In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
Clinton: Ditto for Bill.

Titanic: During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
Clinton: Ditto for Monica.

Titanic: Jack teaches Rose to spit.
Clinton: Let's not go there.

Titanic: Rose gets to keep her jewelry.
Clinton: Monica's forced to return her gifts.

Titanic: Rose remembers Jack for the rest of
her life.
Clinton: Clinton doesn't remember Jack.

Titanic: Rose goes down on a vessel full of
seamen.
Clinton: Monica...ooh, let's not go there, either.

Titanic: Jack surrenders to an icy death.
Clinton: Bill goes home to Hillary... basically, the
same thing.
Received on Wed Nov 1 23:03:27 2006