The Football Hero

"Planting"

A city slicker moves to the country and decides
he's going to take up farming. He heads to
the local co-op and tells the man, "Give me
100 baby chickens." The co-op man complies.

A week later the man returns and says, "Give
me 200 baby chickens." The co-op man complies.

Again, a week later the man returns. This time
he says, "Give me 500 baby chickens."

"Wow!" the co-op man replies. "You must really
be doing well!"

"Naw," said the man with a sigh. "I'm either
planting them too deep or too far apart!"

*****************************************

"The Football Hero"

Larry, a local football star, is jogging down the
street when he sees a building on fire. A lady
is standing on a third story ledge holding her
pet cat in her arms.

"Hey, lady," yells Larry, "Throw me the cat."

"No," she cries, "It's too far."

"I play football, I can catch him."

The smoke is pouring from the windows. Finally,
the woman waves to Larry, kisses her cat goodbye,
and tosses it down to the street. Larry keeps his
eye on the cat as it comes hurtling down toward
him. The feline bounces off an awning and Larry
runs into the street to catch it. He jumps six feet
into the air and makes a spectacular one handed
catch. The crowd that has gathered to watch the
fire breaks into cheers.

Larry does a little dance, lifts the cat above his
head, wiggles his knees back and forth, then
spikes the cat into the pavement.
Received on Mon Feb 13 06:21:57 2006