Life Is Like A Box Of Chocolates?

"Life Is Like A Box Of Chocolates?"

Life is like a box of chocolates...a cheap,
thoughtless, perfunctory gift that nobody
ever asks for. Unreturnable, because all
you get back is another box of chocolates.

You're stuck with this undefinable whipped-
mint rubbish that you mindlessly wolf down
when there's nothing else left to eat.

Sure, once in a while, there's a peanut
butter cup, or an English toffee.

But they're gone too fast, and the taste is
fleeting. So you end up with broken bits,
filled with hardened jelly and teeth-shattering
nuts, and if you're desperate enough to eat
those, all you've got left is an empty box...
filled with useless, brown paper wrappers.

**********************************

"Bald Eagle"

One day a man was walking in the woods
when he got lost. For two days he roamed
around trying to find a way out. He had not
eaten anything during this period and was
famished.

Over on a rock ledge he spotted a bald eagle.
He killed it, and started to eat it. Surprisingly,
a couple of park rangers happen to find him
at that very moment, and arrested him for
killing an endangered species.

In court, he plead innocent to the charges
against him, claiming that if he didn't eat the
bald eagle he would have died from starvation.
The judge ruled in his favor.

In the judge's closing statement he asked the
man, "I would like you to tell me something
before I let you go. I have never eaten a bald
eagle, nor ever plan on it. What did it taste like?"

The man answered, "Well, it tasted like a cross
between a whooping crane and a spotted owl..."
Received on Sun Feb 12 09:02:35 2006