Charity

"The Bill"

A pipe burst in a lawyer's house, so he
called a plumber. The plumber arrived,
unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-
type things for a while, and handed the lawyer
a bill for $600.

The lawyer exclaimed, "This is ridiculous! I
don't even make that much as a lawyer!"

The plumber replied sympathetically, "Neither
did I when I was a lawyer."

********************************************

"Charity"

A local United Way office realized that it had
never received a donation from the town's
most successful lawyer. The person in charge
of contributions called him to persuade him to
contribute. "Our research shows that out of a
yearly income of at least $500,000, you give
not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give
back to the community in some way?"

The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and
replied, "First, did our research also show that
my mother is dying after a long illness, and has
medical bills that are several times her annual
income?"

Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbled,
"Um...no."

"--or that my brother, a disabled veteran, is
blind and confined to a wheelchair?"

The stricken United Way rep began to stammer
out an apology but was interrupted, "--or that my
sister's husband died in a traffic accident," the
lawyer's voice rising in indignation, "leaving her
penniless with three children?!"

The humiliated United Way rep, completely
beaten, said simply, "I had no idea..."

On a roll, the lawyer cut him off once again: "--so
if I don't give any money to them, why should I
give any to you?!?"
Received on Tue Apr 25 04:29:46 2006