Request For A Raise

"Request For A Raise"

Mr. Penis requests a promotion and a raise in
salary for the following reasons:

1. has to work hard
2. has to work at great depths
3. has to work upside down
4. has no ventilation or air conditioned work
environment
5. has to work in a high humidity environment
with odors
6. has to work at high temperatures
7. does not get weekends and holidays off
8. does not get time off after extra hours of work
9. has a hazardous work environment that often
causes illness

Management Reply: Request denied -------
for the following reasons:

1. does not work 8 hours straight during any work
period
2. does not respond immediately to any requests
3. co-workers often unsatisfied by job performance
4. falls asleep after a short activity period
5. shows no evidence of loyalty at the workplace
6. works better alone than with others
7. does not work at all unless pushed from behind
8. does not leave the workplace clean after finishing
work
9. sometimes leaves work too early
Received on Mon May 23 01:33:27 2005