Disaster

"The Dog"

The deliveryman looked over the gate towards the house
which was his package's destination, and saw a large and
aggressive-looking dog on the lawn, staring at him. There
was also a woman looking at him from an open first-floor
window. He shouted to the woman, "Is your dog friendly?"
She said, "Yes." So the deliveryman opened the gate, and
was promptly savaged by the dog.

When he had been rescued from the dog, the deliveryman
angrily said to the woman, "I thought you said your dog
was friendly!"

"He is," said the woman, "but that's not my dog."

************************************

"Disaster"

One afternoon a man came home from work to find total
mayhem in his house.

His three children were outside, still in their pajamas,
playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers
strewn all around the front yard.

The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front
door to the house.

Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess.

A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was
wadded against one wall.

In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon
channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and
various items of clothing.

In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food
was spilled on the counter, dog food was spilled on
the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a
small pile of sand was spread by the back door. He
quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and
more piles of clothes, looking for his wife.

He was worried she may be ill, or that something serious
had happened. He found her lounging in the bedroom, still
curled in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She
looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went.
He looked at her bewildered and asked, "What happened
here today?"

She again smiled and answered, "You know everyday
when you come home from work and ask me what in
the world did I do today?"

"Yes," was his incredulous reply.

She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it."
Received on Wed May 18 01:43:15 2005