Buying Stamps

"Buying Stamps"

There she stood in the line at the post office, a line
that wound its way almost out the front door. A fellow
customer spoke to the elderly lady waiting to buy
some stamps.

"Ma'am, you must be very tired. Did you know there's
a stamp machine over there in the corner?" He
pointed to the machine built into the wall.

"Why yes, thank you," the lady replied, "but I'll just
wait here a little while longer. I'm getting close to
the window."

The customer became insistent.

"But it would be so much easier for you to avoid this
long line and buy your stamps from the machine."

The woman patted him on the arm and answered,
"Oh, I know. But that old machine would never ask
me how my grandchildren are doing."

******************************************

"The Bartender"

Four retired guys, two from California and two
from Arizona, are walking down a street in Chicago.
They turn a corner and see a sign that states:

"Old Timer's Bar"

"ALL DRINKS 10 CENTS!"

They look at each other and then go in.

The old bartender says in a voice that carries across
the room, "Come on in and let me pour one for you.
What'll it be, Gentlemen?"

There seems to be a fully stocked bar, so the men
all ask for a martini.

In short order, the bartender serves up 4 iced
martinis and says, "That'll be 10 cents each, please."

They can't believe their good luck. They pay the 40 cents,
finish their martinis, and order another round. Again,
four excellent martinis are produced with the bartender
again saying, "That's 40 cents, please." They pay the 40
cents, but their curiosity is more than they can stand.
They've each had two martinis and so far they've spent
less than a dollar.

Finally one of the men couldn't stand it any longer and
asks the bartender, "How can you afford to serve
martinis as good as these for a dime a piece?"

"Here's my story. I'm a retired tailor from Brooklyn, and
I always wanted to own a bar. Last year I hit the lottery
for $25 million and decided to open this place. Every
drink costs a dime - wine, liquor, beer, all the same."

"Wow!! That's quite a story," says one of the men. The
four of them sipped at their martinis and couldn't help
but notice three other guys at the end of the bar who
didn't have a drink in front of them, and hadn't ordered
anything the whole time they were there.

One man gestures at the three at the end of the bar
without drinks and asks the bartender, "What's with
them?"

The bartender says, "Oh, them... They're seniors
from Florida. They're waiting for happy hour!"
Received on Fri May 6 06:08:44 2005