Winning the Election

"Campaigning on the Reservation"

It was election time and a politician decided to
go out to the local reservation and try to get the
Native American vote. They were all assembled in
the Council Hall to hear the speech. The politician
had worked up to his finale, and the crowd was
getting more and more excited. "I promise better
education opportunities for Native Americans!"

The crowd went wild, shouting "Hoya! Hoya!"

The politician was a bit puzzled by the native word,
but was encouraged by their enthusiasm. "I promise
gambling reforms to allow a Casino on the Reservation!"

"Hoya! Hoya!" cried the crowd, stomping their feet.

"I promise more social reforms and job opportunities
for Native Americans!"

The crowd reached a frenzied pitch shouting, "Hoya! Hoya!
Hoya!"

After the speech, the Politician was touring the reservation,
and saw a tremendous herd of cattle. Since he was raised
on a ranch, and knew a bit about cattle, he asked the Chief
if he could get closer to take a look at the cattle.

"Sure," the Chief said, "but be careful not to step in the
hoya."

************************************

"Senator's Statement"

A member of the Senate, known for his hot temper
and acid tongue, explodes one day in mid session
and begins to shout,

"Half of this Senate is made up of cowards and
corrupt politicians!"

All the other Senators plead to the angry member
that he withdraw his statement, or be removed from
the remainder of the session. After a long pause,
the angry member accepted.

"Ok" he said, "I withdraw what I said. Half of this
Senate is NOT made up of cowards and corrupt
politicians!"

************************************

"Winning the Election"

The politician was sitting at his campaign
headquarters when the phone rang. He listened
intently, and after a moment his face brightened.
When he hung up, he immediately phoned his
mother to tell her the good news.

"Ma," he shouted, "the results are in. I won the
election!"

"Honestly?"

The politician's smiled faded. "Aw, heck, Ma,
why bring that up at a time like this?"
Received on Mon Jan 17 08:16:56 2005