The New Baby

"Paying Bills"

My wife and I, both graduate students, recently
celebrated the arrival of our first child. At my wife's
insistence, we had paid our entire medical bill and
were now worried about meeting other payments.

We were discussing our sad financial situation one
evening when our son demanded a diaper change.

As my wife leaned over the baby's crib, I heard her
mutter, "The only thing in the house that's paid for,
and it leaks."

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"The New Baby"

With all the new fertility technology , a 66 year old
woman was recently able to give birth to a baby.
When she was discharged from the hospital and
went home, her relatives came to visit.

"May we see the new baby?" one asked.

"Not yet," said the mother. "I'll make coffee and
we can visit for awhile first."

Thirty minutes had passed, and another relative
asked, "May we see the new baby now?"

"No, not yet," said the mother.

After a few minutes had elapsed, they asked
again, "May we see the baby now?"

"No, not yet," replied the mother.

Growing very impatient, they asked, "Well, when
can we see the baby?"

"When it cries!" she told them.

"When it cries??" they demanded. "Why do we
have to wait until it CRIES?"

"Because I forgot where I put it . . . .!!!!"
Received on Sun Apr 10 02:03:50 2005