Dead Men Don't Bleed

"Dead Men Don't Bleed"

Perhaps you've heard of the man who thought he was
dead, when in reality he was very much alive. His
delusion became such a problem that his family
finally paid for him to see a psychiatrist.

The psychiatrist spent many laborious sessions trying
to convince the man he was still alive. Nothing seemed
to work. Finally the doctor tried one last approach. He
took out his medical books and proceeded to show the
patient that dead men don't bleed. After hours of tedious
study, the patient seemed convinced that dead men
don't bleed.

"Do you now agree that dead men don't bleed?" the doctor
asked.

"Yes, I do," the patient replied.

"Very well, then," the doctor said.

He took out a pin and pricked the patient's finger. Out came
a trickle of blood.

The doctor asked, "What does that tell you?"

"Oh my goodness!" the patient exclaimed as he stared
incredulously at his finger....... "Dead men do bleed!!"

************************************

"Napoleon"

A wild-eyed man dressed in a Napoleonic costume and hiding his
right hand inside his coat entered the psychiatrist's office
and nervously exclaimed, "Doctor, I need your help right away."

"I can see that," retorted the doctor. "Lie down on that couch
and tell me your problem."

"I don't have any problem," the man snapped. "In fact, as
Emperor of France I have everything I could possibly want:
money, women, power -- everything! But I'm afraid my wife,
Josephine, is in deep mental trouble."

"I see," said the psychiatrist, humoring his distraught
patient. "And what seems to be her main problem?"

"For some strange reason," answered the unhappy man,
......"she thinks she's Mrs. Smith."
Received on Tue Oct 12 16:49:48 2004