Medieval Pick-Up Lines II

"Medieval Pick-Up Lines II"

How, you ask, did I get up here to your balcony? Well,
I espied you from yonder garden. In an instant my er,
heart was swelled with lust.. er, love. I had to meet you!
So I ranneth over but tripped on a stone thusly pole-vaulting
into your arms.

I've been VERY NAUGHTY. You'll have to put me in the stocks
and...er... PUNISH me, now won't you?

C'mon, sweetie...Didn't your mother ever tell you? A cleric
a day keeps the black plague away.

I lost my leg in battle. Guess what I'm walking on!

Yes, fair maiden, I am indeed a wizard. Shall I make your
clothes disappear?

I'm really a prince cursed by an evil witch. Tell me, do you
have sex with frogs?

My! But you are a beautiful damsel in distress! Allow me to
help you out of it.

I seem to have lost my sex slave, can I borrow you for a bit?

You know, I was once imprisoned in a tower very much like
Repunnzel. Only it wasn't my hair that the queen asked me
to let down.

I may not be a priest, but I can get you to heaven, m'lady.

Come up to my chamber and I'll show you the largest treasure
in the land.

Wanna polish my pike?

Ello, milady, thou art under siege. I shall scale thy battlements
with my grappling hook!

My Lady, dost thou possess a looking glass in thine bodice?
For I may surely see myself within their folds.

Milady, it's not the size of the wand that matters, but the magic
within.

I have the key to your chastity belt and you have the key to my
heart.

Your eyes are as dark as a castle moat by midnight. Lower
your drawbridge and let me cross.

You should be glad I'm not a Viking. You would have been
ravaged and plundered by now.

What's a nice maiden like you doing in a dungeon like this?

You scratch my boils and I'll scratch yours.

They don't call me Lance-A-Lot for nothing, you know.

My that's a fine set of chalices you have there.

When the Inquisition put me on the rack, my limbs weren't the
only thing they stretched.
Received on Wed Nov 17 06:11:55 2004