More Oneliners

"More Oneliners"

Never leave your wife's anniversary present in a
Wal-Mart bag.

Children have more need of models than of critics

The person who pays for the pizza gets the toppings
that fall off in the box.

Definition of a will: It's a dead giveaway.

Sadder than work left unfinished, is work never begun.

Remove the silver from a mirror and even a rich man
won't see his face.

I don't need beauty sleep, I need a coma.

I can't remember when times were not hard and
money not scarce

Don't ever slam a door; you might want to go back.

When you breathe, you inspire. When you do not
breathe, you expire.

Born-agains want to serve G~d . . . but only as advisers.

It is better to be roughly right than to be precisely wrong.

What we see depends on mainly what we look for.

If you don't have a sense of humor, do you have any sense
at all?

The only desert in Canada is located in Osoyoos B.C.

We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough ?

The less education you have . . . the more you have to use
your brain.

An archeologist is someone whose career lies in ruins.

I can't go back to yesterday, because I was a different
person then.

To a worm, digging in the hard ground is more relaxing
than going fishing.

I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?

University politics are vicious, precisely because the
stakes are so small.
Received on Sun Jan 4 03:16:27 2004