Ugliest Man In The World

"Ugliest Man In The World"

One day, Hercules, Snow White and the Quazzimodo
(Hunchback of Notre Dame) were standing around talking.
Hercules spoke up and said, "I bet I am the strongest
man in the world."

Snow White then looked around and said, "Well I bet
that I am the most beautiful person in the world."

Then Quazzimodo looks around and quietly said, "I
suppose that I am the ugliest man in the world."

An old man who had been listening in on there
conversation said, "There is a psychic on top of that
hill up there, why don't you each go in there and ask
her yourself?"

The three friends agreed and they hiked to the top of
the hill. Hercules went in first and came out a few
minutes later and said, "I was right, I am the
strongest man in the world."

Snow White went in next. She came out a few minutes
later and said, "I was also right, I am the most
beautiful person in the world."

Finally it was Quazzimodo's turn. He went in and after
a few minutes he came out scratching his head. He looks
up at his friends and said:

"Who is Dennis Rodman?"

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"Human Resources & The 7 Dwarfs"

In every Human Resources report, there is a reason
for termination. There are so many possibilities, that
we have narrowed the list down to the 7 dwarfs.
Here they are:

Happy: Had trouble putting nose to the grindstone.
Too much time spent telling jokes at the water cooler.

Doc: Left to pursue further schooling, in particular, Ph.D.
work.

Sleepy: Chronically late for work. Caused many project
delays.

Grumpy: Poor attitude toward work. Not a team player.
Trouble with early mornings.

Dopey: Made several critical errors at work costing the
company money, e.g., misappropriated company funds.

Sneezy: Recurrent, chronic illness has made it difficult
for the employee to complete work in a timely fashion.

Bashful: Lack of initiative. Not willing to make cold calls.
Too often let workplace disagreements simmer.

OTHERS

Jealous Queen: Heavy involvement in the occult not
congruent with organizational policies.

Snow White: Misconduct, e.g., kissing strange men
while under some kind of trance.

Huntsman: Couldn't stand to be cooped up in the office
all day. Pursuing work with the National Forest Service.
Received on Mon Aug 9 09:35:35 2004