Subject: Just Thinking
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Thu Nov 13 2003 - 06:50:13 EST
"Just Thinking"
I was thinking about how the status symbols of
today is those pagers that everyone has clipped
on. I can't afford one so I'm wearing my garage
door opener.
You know, I spent a fortune on deodorant before
I realized that people didn't like me anyway.
I was thinking that women should put pictures of
missing husbands on beer cans!
I was thinking about old age and decided that it is
when you still have something on the ball but you
are just too tired to bounce it.
I thought about making a movie for folks my age
and call it "Pumping Rust."
I have gotten that dreaded furniture disease ....that's
when your chest is falling into your drawers!
You know when people see a cat's litter box, they
always say, "Oh,have you got a cat?" Just once I
wanted to say, "No, it's for company!"
I thought about how mothers feed their babies with
little tiny spoon sand forks so I wonder what
Chinese mothers use. Perhaps toothpicks?
Employment application blanks always ask who is
to be notified in case of an emergency. I think you
should write . . . A good doctor!
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post
Office? What are we supposed to do . . . write to
these men? Why don't they just put their pictures
on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look
for them while they delivered the mail?
I was thinking about how people seem to read the
Bible a whole lot more as they get older then it
dawned on me . . . they were cramming for their
finals. Or looking for loopholes.
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