Subject: Legal Bill
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Thu Jun 05 2003 - 10:08:57 EDT
"Legal Bill"
A corporate executive received a monthly bill from the law
firm that was handling a big case for his company. It
included hourly billing for conferences, research, phone
calls, fax, photocopying, and everything but lunch hours.
Unhappy as he was, the executive knew that the company
would have to pay for each of these services. Then he
noticed one item buried in the middle of the list:
FOR CROSSING THE STREET TO TALK TO YOU,
THEN DISCOVERING IT WASN'T YOU AT ALL -- $125.
*********************
"Deposition"
The following portion of a transcript, which was
confirmed with the counsel involved (Ms. Olschner)
and subsequently was posted on Lexis Counsel
Connect. The transcript is from Birmingham,
Alabama, although the use of a deposition of a
party opponent "for any purpose" is also in the
federal rules. We have no word on what had
happened immediately prior to this exchange:
THE COURT: Next witness.
MS. OLSCHNER: Your Honor, at this time I would
like to swat Mr. Buck in the head with his client's
deposition.
THE COURT: You mean read it?
MS. OLSCHNER: No, sir. I mean to swat him [on]
the head with it. Pursuant to Rule 32, I may use the
deposition "for any purpose" and that is the purpose
for which I want to use it.
THE COURT: Well, it does say that.
(Pause.)
THE COURT: There being no objection, you may
proceed.
MS. OLSCHNER: Thank you, Judge Hanes.
(Whereupon Ms. Olschner swatted Mr. Buck in the
head with a deposition.)
MR. BUCK: But Judge...
THE COURT: Next witness.
MR. BUCK: We object.
THE COURT: Sustained.
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