Subject: Dept. of Defense Engineers
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Sun Jul 27 2003 - 03:12:23 EDT
"Dept. of Defense Engineers"
Five Cannibals get appointed as engineers in a
Defense Department Organization. During the
welcoming ceremony the boss says: "You're all
part of our team now. You can earn good money
here, and you can go to the cafeteria for something
to eat. So don't trouble the other employees." The
cannibals promise not to trouble the other employees.
Four weeks later the boss returns and says: "You're
all working very hard, and I'm very satisfied with all of
you. One of our cleaners has disappeared, however.
Do any of you know what happened to her?"
The cannibals disavowed all knowledge of the missing
cleaner. After the boss has left, the leader of the
cannibals says to the others: "Which of you idiots ate
the cleaning lady?" A hand raises hesitantly, to which
the leader of the cannibals says: "You fool! For four
weeks we've been eating Team Leaders, Division
Chiefs and Project Managers so no-one would notice
anything, and you have to go and eat the cleaning lady!"
***********************
"A Pastor, A Lawyer And An Engineer"
Back in France in the late 1700s, three men were
to be executed by the guillotine: a pastor, a lawyer
and an engineer.
First the pastor was led to the device. His neck was
laid on the cradle at the bottom of the guillotine. The
blade was hoisted to the top of the device, paused,
and then released. Just a few inches before the
blade struck his neck, it suddenly stopped! The
watching crowd gasped!
The executioner, thunderstruck by the fact that his
device had failed to finish its job, said to the pastor,
"The penalty was ordered by the court, the procedure
was carried out, but the device failed to complete it's
job. You are hereby free to go. Never show your face
in this town again."
The pastor, thanking his good fortune, hurried away
from the execution area, never to be seen again.
The lawyer was next. He was led up, hands shackled,
and his head was laid on the cradle at the bottom of the
device. The blade was raised, sprung free at the top of
the track, and sped down the rails to the counselor's
neck. Suddenly, he, too, was spared, as the blade
stopped just inches from his neck.
The executioner, again faced by the fact that his device
had failed to finish its job, said to the lawyer, "The penalty
was ordered by the court, the procedure was carried out,
but the device failed to complete it's job. You are hereby
free to go. Never show your face in this town again."
The lawyer, thanking his good fortune, hurried away,
determined to start a new career in a new town.
Lastly, the engineer was led up the steps to the guillotine.
As he was led to the place where he would lay his neck,
he looked up at the execution device, and said, "Oh, I see
what the problem is..."
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