Subject: Malapropisms & such
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Mon Jan 06 2003 - 02:29:55 EST
"Malapropisms & such"
People who live beyond their means should act
their wage.
If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in
her way.
The image of you playing Frisbee with a dog isn't
so farfetched.
The wise never marry, and when they marry, they
become otherwise.
Why do some sausages have meat at one
end and corn meal at the other?
Because it is hard to make both ends meat.
Two lovers who had been apart for some time
were reunited on a foggy day?
One whispered to the other 'I mist you'.
"I see you went crazy at that big summer sale."
"You got that right. I almost bought their elevator
'cause it was marked down."
"I felt great just chewing away, blowing huge bubbles.
Then the bubble burst, it lost its flavor, and I started
worrying about my life again and what it means..."
"Yep! That's the trouble with Carefree Gum."
I'm not saying that the customer service in my bank
is bad, but when I went in the other day and asked
the clerk to check my balance... she leaned over
and pushed me.
A tax collector went to a tannery. "Why haven't you
paid your taxes?" the collector asked the owner of
the tannery. "Business has been very bad," answered
the tanner. "Do you mind if I check around the place?"
asked the tax man. "Go ahead," invited the owner,
"You'll see I have nothing to hide."
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