Subject: Joke To Teach About Modern Times
From: Unicorn (unicorn@indenial.com)
Date: Wed May 15 2002 - 10:39:28 EDT
"Conversation"
(Copyright@2002 Irene A. Mystery
Reprint rights are granted as long as
copyright is stated.)
Yasser Arafat and Osama Bin Laden are having
a conversation. Osama is venting his frustrations
to Yasser, "Just look at us! We are both doing
the same thing. We use the same training camps
for our soldiers. We are both using explosives
and other terrorist actions. We are both targeting
civilians. We both use civilians as human shields
for our troupes. But *you* won the Nobel Peace
Prize, and I am on the FBI's Most Wanted List!
I don't understand it!"
Yasser Arafat smirks and says, "Oh, that's
easy to explain. I only kill Jews."
*****************************
"Joke To Teach About Modern Times"
A Texan, a Frenchman and an Israeli are on a
plane flying over the Pacific Ocean when the
engines stop functioning. The plane crash lands
on a Pacific Island and the 3 are immediately
captured by a tribe of cannibals and taken to
their village.
The Chief tells the 3 captives that these
cannibals are civilized and they have a custom
on their island that before they eat anyone, they
grant that person his or her last wishes, no
matter what they are.
He asks the Texan, "What is your last wish?"
The Texan replies: "I want a 2 inch thick steak
with all the trimmings, Cajun fries and a case of
Bud." The Chief motions to some of his tribesmen
who immediately run into the jungle and come
back with the steak, the fries and the beer. The
Texan eats his meal and he is thrown in the pot.
The Frenchman is asked: "What is your last wish?"
He replies: "I'd like a case of Don Perignon and I'd
also like a big plate of escargot cooked in the
French manner." The Chief motions to his tribesmen
who immediately rush off into the jungle and bring
back everything the Frenchman asked for. He eats
and drinks his fill, and he is then thrown in the pot.
The Chief turns to the Israeli and asks, "And what is
your wish?" The Israeli looks the Chief squarely in
the eyes and replies: "I want you to kick me in the
behind as hard as you can." The Chief is bewildered
and asks the Israeli again, only to receive the same
reply. "I want you to kick me in the behind as hard
as you can."
The Chief shrugs his shoulders, asks the Israeli to
turn around, and kicks him as hard as he can. With
that the Israeli pulls out a gun and kills the Chief
and all of the other cannibals.
The Texan and the Frenchman get out of the pot,
look at the Israeli and say: "If you had that gun,
why didn't you do anything sooner?"
The Israeli replies: "What? And risk being
condemned by the UN, EU and the State
Department for 'overreacting' to insufficient
provocation?"
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